Friday, July 6, 2018 I sat with an awesome man of God who is setting a standard for single men and allowing God to lead him along the way. Derrick Richardson (28) is a young man on fire for the things of God. His life continues to embody Jesus and what HE stands for and this interview is an inside read to him being single the right way.
Derrick attends church at Glorious Bethlehem Temple. He is single and taking time to meet new people. "As far as am I dedicated to one particular person right now, no. I'm just keeping my options open, “Derrick stated. He also stated this is something that is working for him right now because he is not in a rush to be in a relationship. He is comfortable and complacent with just waiting. "If it happens it happens. If it doesn’t, it doesn’t," he said.
I think this is very vital when single. So many people are in a rush to be in a relationship and not giving themselves time to meet people. When we rush, we limit God from causing us to cross paths with people he feels are suitable for us. Then on the other side, others may be too involved with being single and not giving God the opportunity to work in his timing to send someone, whether being single is short lived, or long term. This is a time to have fun and make connections while being open, seeking God, and allowing him to have his way.
With what God has done in his life and heart, Derrick's views of dating has become different from what this generation is used to. He is less interested in the status quo of dating, but more interested in allowing himself the freedom to experience singleness freely and wait for the time when he meets that special someone. When asked what his single life is like, his response was, “my single life is awesome.” Derrick is a great example of someone who is maximizing his singleness. He has no children so he loves that in this moment in his life he gets to enjoy traveling, being able to save and do things for himself. “When you really get into a relationship with someone, let’s say like it’s really in depth. When it comes time for like Christmas and Thanksgiving and everything like that, that’s when people want to spend time together and all. Yeah, it’s different because I normally always use holidays to go out of town.” Derrick has traveled to places like Belize, Dominican Republic, Mexico, The Bahamas, Costa Rica, Saint Martin, etc. His goal is to start trying to travel to places Greece and England.
He has been able to accomplish so much, in addition to this, graduating from college and purchasing a home for himself. God has given him grace, annointing and purpose in this time.
Including God in Singleness
Derrick includes God in his singleness in every way possible. He stated he includes God in all he does, whether it’s by means of social media, or out in public. He stated that he tries to make sure of is that whatever woman he chooses for his life, he wants to make sure they are on the same page. This is including religous beliefs. When we include God in our singleness, it will be easier to include him in our relationships. We are more careful about who we tie ourselves with. Our relationships should be built on God so we have to tie ourselves to people who agree. I believe this will help with getting married the right way.
Derrick prides himself on serving God. Just from conversing with him, I could tell that’s one thing he loves to do. I asked him to list some things he does in his church: He sings on the praise team, he manages the church’s community partnerships and outreach, media relations, public relations. He does the logo for their church as well as the promoting and advertisement. Because he went to school for public relations, he is able to use what he has learned in college to help grow their church and win souls to God’s kingdom. It’s important to be involved in ministry, especially in singleness. Ministry will give you plenty of things to do and keep you focused on the things of God.
Derrick has an awesome single life as he has brothers and spends time with his parents. He spends time with friends by going to outings and catching the latest movie. Being alone during singleness is not always a bad thing. However, it is not good to isolate from the world. Find people you can spend time with and hang out with. It’s important to be around people who will encourage you and hold you accountable. Being alone can be beneficial as long as you are strong enough. Derrick stated that spending time with himself and focusing on his relationship with God makes him a better person. He knew there were things that he needed to deal with in his singleness and he is learning how to be the man he needs to be so that he can be better in a relationship and ultimately as a husband.
As singles, we have to include God in picking our mates. Derrick stated he goes on a fast every Wednesday from 12am to 4pm. Sometimes he has fasts in general if there is nothing he is seeking God for specifically. However, fasting is a way he uses to really seek God when he is dating a woman. This is something that he knows will help him when he does feel like he has met the right woman. Fasting will be a way to seek God on proposing to her and seeking God on if he should really pursue her. I love that he is in the mind frame of seeking God about a woman. I feel a man who will seek our heavenly father about a woman is a man who will be a great husband because he knows how to go to God in everything.
Derrick has decided to have a made up mind to keep his body as a living sacrifice. I applaud a man who is strong enough to make this decision, especially after having a past of being able to be with women when he wanted. He talked about how in the past he didn’t always value women. This is not an easy task for anyone. But after giving his life to God, this was a decision he made. He stated since he has been walking with God, he is in a better place and is a better man. He is more capable now to treat women with value and respect because of who God has made him to be.
It was great to sit with him and have this conversation. I wanted to shine light one of many men who are taking steps toward getting closer to God. Derrick is living the life of a Godly man who wants to please God with his life.He's also so energetic and full of life and loves to have fun. His advice to single young women is to seek God first. Don’t get caught up in looks because the outside fades. Develop agape love (the God kind of love) in a relationship because that is what will stand the test of time.